If one had to sum up what the meaning of marriage is, we’d be safe to look at the vows doey and teary eyed couples recite to eachother on the big day, those ” to have and to hold all the days of my life” , “in sickness and health ” till death do us part”, and of cause one of the most ominous lines ” to be faithful and loyal” which married couples , as recent stats reveal , is the one line funding the increase in business for divorce Attorneys.
Despite the vows painting the union as a real life “The Notebook”. Marriage often presents a mirag of a secure place to raise the best children, a place of loyalty and trust , and a place where two people come together for the better and as a depicted in most Disney movies a place where you suddenly receive a boost in life satisfaction, vitality, and living conditions.
A recent survey done by Stats SA Shows a an increase in divorce rates and a decrease in civil unions , simply put less people want to tie the big knot, and those that did are frequently jumping ship or the confetti covered and tin trailed cars rather.
The rise in divorces is a worldwide phenomenon, and a 2,6% increase in South African divorce rates shows that either people weren’t entirely sure of what they signed up for or rather marriage might be loosing its shine and glory. It could be that this current generation is finding that their identities and reality are becoming more and more difficult to put into the model of marriage as we know it.
Marriage throughout the ages has constantly morphed and evolved throughout society, in fact marriage and love is a relatively new concept. According to Tia Ghose of LIVE SCIENCE back in the day people got married for elevating or maintaining social classes, pregnancy, money or taking over kingdoms -Game of thrones –
One thing for sure is the major identity transformation that women have gone through over the ages, images of the dainty, subdued and subservient lady have been replaced with a fierce, raw and unapologetic woman , she for one does not have much room in the how “a married woman should be” Manual. Woman recently got access to the “bake your cake and eat it club” , the candy land of human existence , a taste of liberation and equality that many woman never dreamt of.
Men used to be the keys to estates, money, security ,surnames, and title deeds, in fact before 1994 women in South Africa were not allowed to own houses . With the dawn of the independent woman ,today’s modern man is finding his predisposed head of the family role difficult to fit into as well.
But its 2017 now, women have a lot more options when it comes to who they want to be and who they want to be with, hence most of the divorce suits are being filled by woman. With infidelity leading in divorce fillings , the only thing differentiating a marriage and a partnership these days are the legal and customary declarations made in front of friends and judges, since the moral structure of the institution is constantly being disregarded.
Of cause it’s not all doom and gloom, there are married couples who live and have lived on monogamy bliss train, just as there are unmarried partners who do the same. However marriages last stand of emotional , parental, mental , economic and life partner security seem to be under attack. Perhaps new vowes that are “less binding ” need to be created or maybe the social rat race to find a mate and put a ring on it trend is loosing its luster and men and woman are realizing , something other than a few spectators , recitals, pen and paper ensures a life long companion.